In accordance with being your own boss, pulpit leader, and public servant, sometimes you have to be your own cheering grace, which means that you can, and should, be very obviously and audibly talking about your positive attributes in a way that makes you blush, and cheer yourself on to work harder on the heels of such winning praise.
I find that this is a skill (something that we learn to do), that women especially struggle with, as culturally, normal self-talk is usually filled with public and private berating, or it focuses on negatives a bit too much.
These women are also prone to feeling guilty or deeply embarrassed by what I am talking about, as I am professing a level of self-love that they judge, rather than experience, and therefore their discomfort with it is immediate.
So, how much praise do you allow yourself, from yourself? Is it a daily thing? I hope that whatsoever self-love and self-care that you are practicing, you are angling towards something that is daily, or at least, able to sustain you for days, for it is only by such sustenance that the human lives.
As we are residing in and chiding 2021, we have to consider the roaring wash that 2020 was and still is, for some people, in that it took, took, and took, from them, leaving them with little desirable except themselves--and it is this conundrum that people are left with as they are forced to only deal with themselves--and it is this person that they probably wish to get away from if they have not practitioners of proper self-love and self-care.
Indeed, if they have not been practicing it, they are in for a heady ride, as the more and more we live, we can acknowledge that no matter what any else says, how you feel to yourself is important, and you will find that the only thing that brings out positivity, is more positivity.
These are the teats that bring life and keep us motivated in dire circumstances, time and time again.
Science has shown this over and over, in that where a patient is able to provide a winning attitude, that patient's survival is exponentially wider, and their prognosis exponentially better, just because of their positive thinking and their self-love applied in supplying themselves with this attitude.
I heard a story of a paralyzed young lady who has been able to get herself out of the hospital simply because she chose the right attitude about her situation, which is one of the greatest acts of self-love that we must admire, and willfully acquire whenever we can.
I am talking about the level of self-love where you can be caught quietly singing yourself praise just because, as you have learned and listened to yourself over the years, and have accepted that you have to put yourself first, and I mean first, in all kinds of ways.
When it comes to small things and great things alike, how are you quantifying your skills and your assets? Are you seeing yourself as an asset? Have you spent the time honing your positivity so that it can feel like an asset and not a liability, so it has not been affecting your judgments negatively?
Are you the first person you love? Forgive? Accept wholly? Sleep with? Can you sleep with yourself?
What do you think about when you lay your head down? Are they loving thoughts? Thoughts that give you rest and sleeping peace?
Or are you bombarded otherwise? If your answer is otherwise, well this tells what you have been practicing, and it is a time for a change.
Wash yourself from the guilt and shame of knowing that you have wronged yourself, and focus your mind on this new change of a brand new beginning that you are carving out for yourself.
It is really to feel like you are poised on the seat of greatness and nothing otherwise, as this is the second greatest act of self-love; it is to recognize that you are great in size--you are one in a world and in so being, you are one that can change a world, so you are great--and such greatness comes with poise, intended action, and immense love, as this is what it takes to sustain such greatness, within and without.
When you have something important to execute on a large scale, you are usually organized, focused, and charming, as you do the tasks associated with the important activity, as you want to have an intended outcome of excellence and perfection all rolled into one.
Therefore, such greatness and efficacy at such level require the most meticulous of self-love, so that you avoid mistakes, you save money when you can, you choose the best, you do not over budget, et cetera.
You also take your time to use your days well towards its planning; I am talking about birthdays, bar mitzvahs, weddings, parties, and so on.
These things, we do well to execute on a grand scale, and I am challenging you to do your self-love tasks the same way.
I recommend whittling away negative emotions completely, to the point where you are satisfied and content with yourself and your life no matter what, with the expectant attitude that you will surmount any negativity that arises to hinder your task of loving yourself wholly and completely, daily.
You will build a softer, more resilient self, as you are able to slow yourself and your thoughts down, as your anxiety is reduced; you can connect better with others and indeed, others will enjoy connecting with you, and you are likely to see your social connections increase.
It is a process of being thankful and expectant, as waiting is never in vain when you do good planning.
I hope these pointers are helpful as you seek to build a sleek, grander, newer self, and one that is poised for charm and associations with good degrees of wildness, as life is indeed to be had with enjoyment, vibes, and a lot of caring for the self and others, along the way.
Like Alton Brown says, I bid you good eating.
WRITTEN BY
ODETTA FRASER GOD