The approach surrounding personal power and self-esteem is that you fake it until you make it, or you don't.
Even when you speak kind words, talk more assertively and hold your head high, you can still feel discouraged. When you pull back the covers and crawl into bed at night, the negative voices are still there.
Personal power is forming your own ideas and influence without holding a traditional position of power, such as CEO or manager. Have you ever looked at someone and mused, "She just owns it?" Personal power is about your attitude. It's a state of cognizance rather than an attempt to control others. The primary goal of personal power is self-regulation.
Self-esteem is the value you place on your worth.
Personal power and self-esteem make great partners. As you create a positive image of yourself, you're more willing to consider what you want, form ideas, and impact others.
I previously wrote an article about why affirmations might not be working for you. You don't have to give up on affirmations, but you can reclaim your self-esteem and personal power by adding to them.
When we linger in a state of comfort, we don't push our limits. This complacency stunts our growth. Personal power comes from the small wins, from speaking up for yourself—even if nobody listens the first time.
Travel nursing pushed me out of my comfort zone. It inadvertently helped me build personal power, self-esteem, and learn more about myself than ever before.
I've worked as a Registered Nurse for over fifteen years. Four years ago, I went casual at my hospital job and started travel nursing. I would provide relief staffing to hospitals across Canada through travel nursing, also allowing me to explore the country.
Sometimes we know we need to make a shift, but we reason that a catastrophe must happen before changing. The truth is, some parts of our lives have just reached their natural ending.
Now, this isn't one of those stories where I quit my job, danced on my boss's table, saying, "See ya sucker!" No, I had a fallback plan. I reasoned I could always reapply for a position at work if I hated travelling.
Countless uncertainties spiraled inside my head.
What about your pension?
What about your benefits?
What if you don’t find work?
What about your apartment?
All of which were relevant. But I refused to dwell on them. I needed something different for my life. I felt stuck. I was starting to feel miserable. This journey was going to be my eat, pray, love moment—adventuring into the unknown.
It took me over a year to fill out my travel nurse application. Finally, in May of 2017, I started my first contract in a recovery room in the lower mainland, British Columbia, Canada. It was an experience like never before. Although I was skilled in the area, it was a new environment. I had to process a lot of information quickly. But then a shift happened. My mind adapted by creating patterns. I could feel my brain reorganizing even faster than I could understand, shifting under pressure.
Travel nursing represented jumping into the unknown, facing my fears and trusting God. There's an area of your life that signifies this for you too. It doesn't have to be as drastic as traveling around the country. When you embrace your fear and faith, you grow.
Here are some lessons I've learned about personal power and self-esteem while adventuring across Canada .
Interpersonal skills can go further than practical skills.
A 2020 CNN article reported that not only is empathy valuable, it also nurtures powerful relationships. Empathy is a core building block for conflict resolution, understanding and connecting with others.
I've been on assignments with higher-skilled and experienced nurses who sometimes couldn’t complete their contract simply because they couldn't get along with other people. Yes, conflict is bound to happen as personalities clash, but how you navigate these conflicts is vital.
I let society narrate a story of empathy that means weakness. I accepted that the only way to be seen was to be loud. What I realized was that my empathy and intuition made me excellent at reading people and environments. It was an asset.
For example, nurses sometimes meet patient hesitation due to caregiver mistrust. Empathy, patience and respect helped me break those barriers and connect with people.
At times local staff members would be angry at travel nurses for taking their workload or getting paid a higher wage. Empathy allowed me to diffuse those moments. We're allowed to get angry. Offering a change of perspective is, at times, helpful. Of course, you can't please everybody, and in those situations, I also had to learn to regulate my emotions and response.
Leaning into my empathy increased my personal power and self-esteem because I started to accept that they were unapologetically part of me.
Be ready for change at any time.
Expecting the unexpected is a skill on its own.
Travel nursing taught me adaptability. Going to work wasn't just about trading off with the next shift. Often the next shift is the nurse flying in from across the nine remaining provinces. You're praying their flight isn't delayed so you can fly home.
Of course, you can expect delays, so I quickly learned not to plan activities immediately after assignments. I had a rule: give myself three days. Three days to get home, three days of flight delays, three days of being snowed in, three days of lost bags.Three days of the unexpected.
I've watched colleagues become unsettled because they expected to get home on time. They planned lectures, scheduled shifts at their home hospital, or needed to get home to a spouse. After my first few freakouts with being delayed, I learned to adapt better.
I adapt by not dwelling on the negative. At times, you don't have large amounts of time or energy to complain. When you're in an emergency, you need to use your resources to create a new plan. Like the time I hijacked a plane in Northern Ontario...but, I'll leave that story for another time.
Being able to handle change will heighten your personal power. Though you can't control all events, you can monitor your reaction towards them.
Pay attention to how you dress. Always bring a special occasion outfit.
People judge you based on how you look and act.
I've been on assignments where I thought I didn't need more than work uniforms and lounge clothes. I've discovered that you never know who you'll run into or who you will need to impact.
How you present yourself matters. Yes, it isn't fair but instead of being irked, use it as an asset. It's not about being beautiful or in shape, though I've seen how people respond differently to this. I've studied people's reactions mainly while transitioning to flights at the airport. Certain men seem to respond better when you're classically dressed. Women may or may not respond better when you're nicely dressed but seem to respond better when you have a conversation and are respectful with them.
I generally change clothes, shoes, or jackets when headed to more remote areas. I don't want to draw too much attention to myself and dress for the weather conditions.
I use dressing as a form of art, expression and illusion. The fact is, I get more respect when I'm dressed or speak classically and formally.
When you want to make an impact, dress the part.
Scientific American published an article that explains how what you wear can affect your thinking, mediation skills, hormone levels, and heart rate.
Dressing up is a way of reclaiming happiness regardless of outside factors – Geraldine Wharry.
Carry an outfit for a special occasion. You never know when you might need to boost your mood, say your elevator pitch, close a deal, or save your life.
You may not always feel cheerful,but putting on some lipstick, grooming, and not waiting for a special occasion to dress up can lift your self-esteem and leave you feeling empowered.
You have angels that guide and protect you.
You may be scared, but you can always ask God for help.
You will not be prepared for every situation, no matter how much paperwork or preparation you get beforehand. As a travel nurse, organizations expect you to be knowledgeable and skilled. This expectation means you could have a few hours or days of orientation- if that.
It's not uncommon for an emergency to happen before you finish the orientation. I've learned that personal power is less about skill and more about being able to access the information you need. I usually pray before every assignment I go on.
I ask God for three things:
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Murphy's law says that anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
One morning after a tiring shift in Northern British Columbia, Canada, I was walking home. A wolf-dog started following me, towering just below my hips. Its teeth, surrounded by black fur, grabbed my arm. I love dogs, so initially, I thought it was playing. But then it gripped my skin tighter, pushing me off the road. I panicked and looked up. There wasn't a soul in sight.
I prayed.
Immediately another dog darted from the bushes and started to growl and snap at the dog that had my arm. Shortly after, a man strolled from between the bushes, and I yelled at him, "Help me."
Thank God! This man started shouting and making threatening moves towards the dog that latched onto my arm. Eventually, the dog released me. I poured gratitude to the man and continued to climb up the hill, crying all the way home.
No matter how alone you feel, you are not alone. You are one prayer, one action away from a different experience, and there is personal power in that.
Believe in yourself more.
Travel nursing taught me that my voice matters—your voice matters.
Some people sound confident in the way they speak, though they're talking smack. Others have something valid to say but don't because they're scared.
You know more than you think you do.
Travel nurses come from all across Canada and work with different equipment, medication and even units of measurement. When you work in your home hospital, you become familiar with a particular way of operating. However, going to a new environment is humbling. A piece of equipment you're used to using at home can look completely different than the one on your assignment. There is always something you can teach others and always something you can learn no matter how many years you've been in the business.
You only need to believe in yourself more. You have information worth sharing. The more you believe in yourself, the more self-esteem you build.
Take Away
Travel nursing taught me that exposure to environments where we can learn more about ourselves builds personal power and self-esteem. Personal power is the ability to form your own ideas and influence people. Self-esteem is the way we value ourselves.
What travel nursing taught me about personal power and self-esteem is:
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Start the project you're scared of, claim empathy as your strength, go on that adventure, dress to feel confident. Claim your personal power and raise your self-esteem by taking action and facing your fears.
I'm Arlene. I write about holistic self-love and healing , especially for intuitive women. For more of my writings, follow me on Instagram, and sign up for my mailing list for self-love writing, tips, resources and more.
WRITTEN BY
Arlene Ambrose, RN