In our youth-obsessed culture, growing old is more often seen as a fear than it is a privilege denied to many. In my own life, growing old is marked more by contributions to my retirement account than contemplating the quality of life I would like to enjoy as I age. Across society, why isn’t more time spent cultivating the relationships, communities, and hobbies that will fulfill our lives in our later years?
As Chief Knowledge Officer of Healing Healthcare Systems LLC and The C.A.R.E. Channel, Susan Mazer is an expert in aging (at 75 years young), improving the patient experience in healthcare settings, and healing environments, among other topics. She has developed philosophies for leading a full life as you age, and I believe they are vitally important to share.
Whether it’s learning to embrace the activities you love, staying open to new technology, or expanding your social circle, here’s what Susan writes about how to stay vital no matter where you are in your journey:
Everyone wants to live a long and vital life, and research shows that the odds are stacked in our favor. It is projected that people will live well into their eighties in the coming decades (up from the ripe old age of 38 in the early 1900s), with more than a few of us living longer. In fact,  95,000 people lived to 100 in 1990—a number that is expected to grow to 25 million by 2100. This begs the question: How do we ensure that these years are well spent? What can each of us do, starting now, to make sure that we can continue unwrapping the gift of life every day that it is offered? Can we really continue to live fully as an older person?
The short answers are “yes” and “no.”
Physically, as we age, we may not get the same high mileage when we are 75 that we did when we were 25. Yes, we will tire and maybe need more breaks. Our feet may cry out for rest when they have walked us our whole lives.
We may not eat as much as we did when our metabolisms were at their most efficient—or even like the same foods!
We may need glasses to read when we never needed them. We may not be able to fully understand every word in every commercial because everyone is speaking faster and we are comprehending slower!
Does any of this matter? It depends.
None of these issues have to stop us from doing what we love to do. What will help us the most is to change our expectations of ourselves, making our current limits clear to those who love us so much. It doesn’t matter where we are every day, but on this day, this is what we are comfortable with.
Hearing loss is universal as we age. However, with new technologies, not unlike eyeglasses, we can help ourselves participate in life. Will this take some effort? Maybe. Will it be easy? Not necessarily. However, it is worth the effort because we are worth it.
All of these are physical changes that each of us will go through according to our individual journeys. 
STAY ENGAGED
Florence Nightingale wrote that “living well is using the powers we have.” She points to us not being stopped by skills or capacities that are not what they “used to be.” Rather, she encourages us to accept the place we are in and to keep living!
One key to thriving in our later years is to honor our physical, social, and emotional selves by engaging in ways that make life worth living. The benefits that come from our participation in daily life as it is for us now are available all around us—all we have to do is look.
And we have to adapt!
The renowned pianist Arthur Rubinstein played publicly well into his eighties. Since he couldn’t play as fast as he used to, he sometimes slowed the tempo of the whole piece so that the areas needing more intensity could be played well in the moment. He also feared forgetting what he was playing, which he did on numerous occasions. His experience and artistry saved him, allowing him to continue playing until he was reoriented to the moment.
Nancy Pelosi, the first and only woman Speaker of the House, is also in her eighties and isn’t slowing down anytime soon. Late Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg worked out with her personal trainer twice a week well into her eighties (even bench pressing 70 lbs.). My oldest friend’s mom, who was 100 when she died recently, was on the computer daily after learning how to Zoom during the pandemic, playing games, and making Hallmark e-cards for her friends.
The fact is, you don’t have to be a concert pianist or a Supreme Court judge to do it; you just have to embrace the activities that make you feel alive.
REMAIN ADAPTABLE
Staying engaged requires being able and willing to adapt continuously to the changing you and the world in which you live. When we stop adapting, we stop living. Staying stuck in routines and habits (even with people who may co-sign our “stuckness”) can seem easier, but there is a price to pay—and that price is personal stagnation and sameness. It affects how mentally sharp we are and how physically vital we feel. It may look like disinterest, boredom, and a “been-there-and-done-that” attitude that we cannot seem to shift.
When that happens to me, I am driven to act. I create opportunities that compel me to challenge myself, to learn something new, or to enter into a project unfamiliar to me. I did not know what “binge-watch” meant until the pandemic. Now, that, too, can be a trap. So, small, intentional doses is what I do! I remain curious about the news, new technology, cooking, music, and art, among other things. And of course, travel—either through media or in reality!
My days might be routine, but they aren’t regimented. Sometimes my husband and I go out for lunch, while on other days, we may eat at home, have a potluck with a neighbor, or skip it until dinner!!
In fact, there is an amusing life hack that my husband and I have created that keeps us adaptable and definitely on our toes. My husband will move mounted pictures around the house regularly so that when I see them, it’s like seeing them for the very first time. We recently rearranged the furniture in our music room and installed shelving in the kitchen to get rid of the clutter. Each of these actions hits the refresh button and makes our daily environment more stimulating. (Especially when your husband moves a picture or piece of furniture without telling you!)
REMAIN CONNECTED & EXPAND YOUR SOCIAL CIRCLE
If you have grandchildren, the best way to stay in touch with them is by embracing the technologies that they use every day. That means texting and using apps like WhatsApp and Instagram and maybe dancing with them on Snapchat! Sometimes kids are impatient when they try to “teach” us how to do what they cannot recall not doing. Therefore, look to a peer or friend who knows more than you do!
Additionally, making friends and maintaining friendships with people of all ages is a fun and important way to continue growing, learning, and feeling engaged. My network of friends includes people from each generation prior to mine and those that came after I was born. It is never too early or too late to start expanding your social circle. Doing so contributes to a rich sharing of ideas, conversation, and joyful experiences.
The pandemic brought all of this to the fore. Isolation, loneliness, helplessness…all of these feelings and ways of living struck as we each had to hunker down where we were. Nonetheless, learning new ways to penetrate the emotional walls we build around ourselves—taking advantage of the vast world we have now through the internet and other digital technologies—is a must lest we live alone in our feelings.
WELLNESS IS ENGAGEMENT IS WELLNESS
As we get older, we tend to focus on diet and exercise, but life and living is so much more. More than anything, the relationships we have, that we forge, that show up just because they do…are ever more valuable.
Aging is not about “winding down”—it’s actually an expansion of sorts. As we age, we become free of the angst of our youth and the pressures of young adulthood. We’ve lived long enough to take a look back yet still look forward. Without having to meet expectations of others, we can be easier on ourselves and enjoy the smallest of pleasures. 
The way we age is actually the way we have lived all along. While the “me” inside of us may not match the “me” we see in the mirror, we must acknowledge how amazing we are in thoughts and feelings. Being older asks of us to embrace physical changes the way we had to when we were going through puberty—things that used to entice us may be replaced by other things that are better for the person we are today.
OLDER ISN’T OLD
Albert Einstein, who died at 76, believed in living each day with an enriched sense of mission. His words offer a meaningful directive: “Do not grow old, no matter how long you live. Never cease to stand like curious children before the great mystery into which we were born.”
There may be factors outside our control, but as the Princeton professor and author of Aging Well, Dr. George E. Valiant, notes: “A successful old age may lie not so much in our stars and genes as in ourselves.”
Join me in living, in flourishing, and in celebrating each day. Let’s do something new today and commit to finding the beauty and wonder in the world around us. This is what life offers us for the taking.

WRITTEN BY

An Phan