The person you are right now is a collection of past experiences. Often, these events are subconscious.
Throughout your past experiences, there's an innate urge that fought to get you where you are today. That was your future self watching you back. Your future self is the positive vision you see for your life. It's a series of decisions you make that move you closer to becoming.
It can be increasingly challenging to have hope for the future when the world is full of uncertainty. What if uncertainty is the perfect time to consider what is most important to you? What if uncertainty is the ideal time to co-create your life?
Instead of waiting for circumstances to happen to you, choose the life you want, moment by moment. Your future self can do this for you. She only needs to know what you want from life.
Here are ten questions that bring clarity about what you want from life and move you closer to being the person you're meant to be.
1. What character, values, and personality do you want for yourself?
What characteristics, values, and qualities do you want? More importantly, how do you want to interact with the people around you? How do you want them to feel?
Every time you doubt yourself, you deny endless possibilities to create a more fulfilled future. Don't give up on yourself. Find out what actions you need to take to develop the values you want. Do you need to stick to your calendar to be more consistent? Do you need to accept more help to become a grateful receiver? You can shape your values and character by paying attention to the people and environments around you then deliberately altering these environments to suit your needs.
2. Where do you deny yourself fun, pleasure and ease?
One of the biggest misconceptions we fall into is that we must suffer to get what we want. We think that we must continually work to exist. We believe we must work to receive love and belonging, that our lives can't have too much enjoyment.
You deserve a life that challenges you to evolve and allows some aspect of fun, pleasure, and ease.
3. What do you want less of in life?
To get what you want, you must make room for it.
Making room for what you want often comes after shutting out the noise and distractions. You need to be able to hear your desires.
We think the road to success is by doing more when it's actually about saying no, more often. We need to focus on a few opportunities rather than many. These few are the opportunities that align with the way we move in the world and our vision. They are projects that earn your heart, focus and consistency. Decide to have less of what you don't want so you can make room for what you do want.
4. What do you want more of in life?
Having more isn't just about money or material gain, which isn't a harmful ambition, but what if you had more time, peace, clarity, and discernment to facilitate receiving money?
Think about how you want to feel and why that's important to you.
There, you'll find the answer to what you want more of in life.
5. What have you been tolerating or putting up with that's no longer serving you?
What have you been putting up with that you know in your heart is wrong for you? How are you letting others treat and speak to you? Who are you holding onto just because they're a family member or friend? Who are you scared of offending?
This is your life.
The longer you hold onto circumstances and people who aren't serving you, the more you deny yourself of all you are and can to be.
6. What's the payoff of keeping this problem?
There's always a reason we hold on to our problems. At the root of our psyche, we value love, safety and belonging. We subconsciously hold onto ways of life that provide these feelings, even if they're damaging to us.
We may hold on to weight because it makes us feel safe. For example, we can hold on to weight because it's become part of our identity. If we were to lose weight, it would take away part of our individuality, threatening our feeling of safety-of course, these thoughts are subconscious. Sometimes we aren't ready to handle all the attention we can receive from looking or behaving differently from who others expect us to be. So, we avoid change at all costs, even if a change is what we truly want.
This avoidance might look like repeatedly getting into abusive relationships because we feel undeserving of love. Avoidance might also look like ignoring our boundaries because we want to fit in. Is the payoff worth it? The person you are now is worthy. The person you want to become is also worthy. Your future deserves a chance.
7. If you were to live your life fully, what's the first change you would make?
We often hold back in our lives because of fundamental and perceived limitations.
Limitations are the minimum and maximum of what you're willing to tolerate in your life. Often, we view limitations as what people have placed on us without considering that we place limitations on ourselves.
Close your eyes, imagine all your limitations slowly shedding away. What would you do with this new confidence? The first change you make is a clue into what's important to you. Look for little ways you can move towards those changes right now.
8. Who will it be the hardest on when you make these changes?
We sometimes hold back from our potential because we don't want to leave those closest to us behind. Sometimes these people have shaped our beliefs and expect us to live their way of life. Changing will sever some relationships and challenge your very being. Who will be the most impacted by these shifts?
Sometimes the person most impacted is you.
9. How do you know your logic is true?
We have negative ideas running through our minds all the time. We talk ourselves out of opportunities because we think we're not good enough. We make up stories about what people think of us. Whenever you find yourself in this mental loop, ask, "how do I know my logic is true?"
10. What do you have to believe to have the experience you want?
Your future starts with the assumptions you have right now. What does someone who's living the life you want need to believe? What obstacles have they overcome?
Through it all, you must continually believe in yourself and God's ability to work through you. Why not seek out mentors whose vision and values align with yours? Why not learn from people who might be different, but possess specific skills you can learn and adapt to your needs? Start shifting your mindset to step into your future self. Your future self is the positive vision you see for your life. It's a series of decisions you make that move you closer to becoming.
Who you are and where you are right now is no coincidence. Where you are right now is a result of your choices and beliefs—and some that others made for you. Your future self can change the whole course of your life. She's more than your potential. She's already a part of you.
Your future self is the positive vision you see for your destiny. You only have to claim her.
WRITTEN BYArlene Ambrose